begin

“All great deeds and all great thoughts have a ridiculous beginning. Great works are often born on a street corner or in a restaurant’s revolving door.”  Albert Camus

Begin!  That is all it takes to start something is to begin and yet far too many people put of that very task of getting started.     How many things have you put off waiting for tomorrow, the day that never comes.

Personal happiness, even professional happiness is tied directly to the actions you take not to the actions you don’t take.   Happiness isn’t something that comes to you as a result, happiness comes to you when you do something that you believe is useful.

Leadership expert John Maxwell suggests that we look at four things as that can result in having a happier life.

1. Create and nurture relationships.    People are meant to engage with other people.  Learning how to develop, grow and value relationships.

2. Make decisions.   Making decisions that support who you are and your strengths that are based on sound reasoning will improve outcomes in your life.  It takes discipline and practice to make good decisions.

3. Continual growth.   What are you doing to continually improve upon “who” you are.   That could mean additional education and skills or it could mean doing something that allows you to grow as a person, or it could be learning from the lessons of life.  Take time to reflect on each day and evaluate what you learned.

4. Adding value.   How can you add value to others?   Instead of looking at what you can get ask yourself what you can give.    Shift the equation around, how can I add value to others?   What can I bring to someone else in terms of value?   When you look at the personal development industry you’ll see countless experts giving away information, time and value, so that others can grow and develop.

What does it take to get started?    What does it take to go from waiting to beginning to make a difference?   It takes you taking action.   Stop waiting for tomorrow and start DOING today.

1. Who can you develop a stronger relationship with TODAY?

2. What decision are you holding off making?   What is stopping you from making that decision?

3. What can you do now to improve your personal or professional growth?

4. Who can you add value to?    Shift from “I” to “you”.   What can you do?

Years ago there was a movie about the continual bad news that was heard, news that help people captive to inaction, to being a victim of the circumstances rather than an owner of the solution.   The movie was  ”NETWORK” and the newscaster asked people to get up and yell …    It’s time to begin and take action.

Expressions

“Challenging the meaning of life is the truest expression of the state of being human.”    Viktor E. Frankl

Floral Expressions
The expressions of flowers, dancing in colorful symphony.

Musical Expressions
Musical tones that are set to amaze.

Visual Expressions
A magical light show.

It’s about time

‘Until you value yourself, you will not value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.”   M. Scott Peck

Lost Goals

Many people are putting together thoughts about what they will do “next” year.   In January there are all kinds of plans that are set in motion and in a short amount of time the momentum has turned into a trickle of energy.    The ideas, the dreams and the thoughts of achieving something remarkable blend into the cacophony of everyday life.   The dreams fade, the goals vanish as well as the energy to make life vivid.

Fading Dreams

Why do dreams fade faster than a western sunset?   It might be all the noise that surrounds daily life.  Those little energy drainers that suck just enough out of each day that when it is time to dream and to think of big goals there just isn’t anything left.   It is those life leeches that attach themselves to our lives and continually suck the dream out of us.

Finding Energy

Distractions eat away at the energy to do what you really want to do and eventually there is nothing but distractions and there is little time for focus and doing the things that move you forward.   What are the distractions in your life?

Write down what is distracting you and rate them from 1 – 10 in terms of the energy that they take away from you.   Which distractions can you dispose of?  What can you just get rid of today?

Forget it

There is stuff coming at you from all angles.  Some of the stuff is useless and yet there may be a tendency to hang on to it.  How much of the email you receive each day is of no value at all?   More than one message for sure.

If there is no request that you have to respond to in the email message and the value of the information is low, get rid of it, don’t file it, just flush it and forget it.

File it

Sometimes there are things that are informational, that will have value in the near future.  It might be something that you are passionate about that you can use to move you forward towards you goals.   Even though the material isn’t useful for you today it could be shortly.   File those things and get it out of your mind.

Finish it

Now if you have filed or put it in the trash you should only have things left that are directly related to you achieving your goals.   Now it is time to work on those goals and get them done.  Now that all the distractions have been dealt with all you have left is you and the goal, finish it.

Do it

It does seem like the best time is the New Year to start on a getting life in order.  Why wait?   What is the benefit of waiting?   There is no benefit of waiting.  The time to take action is today, not tomorrow, not after the holidays, not later, it is today, right now.    The right time is right now.   Toss aside the excuses and engage in doing what will bring you positive results today.

Look at simpleology.com and use a tool to help you focus on what you really want.  Decide on what you want to do and start doing it.  Use a tool to track your progress or send you reminders.   Have someone hold you accountable for getting you closer to what you want.   Procrastinate not a minute longer.  Right now, take that first step and start doing what it will take to experience a better life for you.

“A year from now you will wish you had started today.”
Karen Lamb

Three ways to increase happiness

“Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.”  Nathaniel Hawthorne

Happiness is something many people strive for and fail to achieve.   Happiness can be elusive to some and easy to obtain for others.   A new film called “Happy” is documenting happiness, where it is found and how people live a life of happiness.

Recent research provides some steps to achieve greater happiness.   The study of happiness is growing and is a reflection of the positive psychology movement and the strengths movement.  Markus Buckingham one of the leaders in the strengths movement shows people why strengths are important in this short video.   People that use their strengths are happier.   Don’t know your strengths then got to viastrengths and find out what your strengths are.

Another aspect of happiness is purpose.    Having a purpose increases happiness.   Knowing who you are what you are gifted at doing and having the ability to use those gifts increases happiness.    If you haven’t found your purpose or aren’t sure you have a purpose take a look at this.   See if you can figure out your purpose, you’ll be happier when you do have a defined purpose.

The third element of happiness is developing relationships.    Relationships that work well increase happiness.  As we approach the holiday season many people feel stressed due to the fact many relationships aren’t what they should be.   Here are some hints on dealing with broken relationships.

Three steps to increase happiness.

1. Know your purpose

2. Strong and deep relationships

3. Knowing and using your strengths.

What are you doing to increase your happiness?   Happiness is part choice, part development and to some degree inherited qualities.   Choose to be happier.  Choose to develop your strengths and choose to develop deep and meaningful relationships and you will be happier.    Maybe you have a story about how you found happiness, what is it?

deadline

“And he, the said Wirz, still wickedly pursuing his evil purpose, did establish and cause to be designated within the prison enclosure containing said prisoners a “dead line,” being a line around the inner face of the stockade or wall enclosing said prison and about twenty feet distant from and within said stockade; and so established said dead line, which was in many places an imaginary line, in many other places marked by insecure and shifting strips of [boards nailed] upon the tops of small and insecure stakes or posts, he, the said Wirz, instructed the prison guard stationed around the top of said stockade to fire upon and kill any of the prisoners aforesaid who might touch, fall upon, pass over or under [or] across the said “dead line” ….” ["Trial of Henry Wirz," Report of the Secretary of War, Oct. 31, 1865]

A prisoner tries to escape and crosses the “dead line” and the guards have cause to shoot the prisoner.   Crossing the deadline meant certain death.   Newspapers picked up on that term and used it to define a moment in time where what was ready to print was put into print.

Today a deadline is used to mean it must be done by this time.   The deadline to get this or that done often passes by nearly unnoticed in some domains.  A deadline merely marks the desire for something to be completed.   What deadlines have you watched go by?

In the civil war the prisoner’s didn’t have the luxury of watching a deadline go past, they knew that a deadline meant a certain finality.  At one time a deadline was enforced, now it is a term that doesn’t carry the weight or final conclusion that it once did.    You’ve reached the deadline and find that you are unable to cross it.

A deadline demarks the boundary around a prison, an imaginary line which could not be crossed.  In today’s world people feel like they are living in a prison where crossing the boundary does mean a type of death.  People are enclosed within the deadline by fear, the fear of failure, the fear of change, the fear of not being good enough, or the fear of success.   To cross the deadline means something will have changed and that fear prevents them from crossing the deadline.

The deadline now lives in our imagination rather than being an imaginary boundary around a prison.   Our boundary line which we have declared holds us back from being the kind of person we could really be.  What is your deadline?  How close is it to your prison walls?   What would happen if you crossed that deadline?

The prison that you are the prisoner of could be a prison of debt,  the prison of doubt, the prison of fear, the prison of worry, the prison of work, the prison of a relationship, the prison of time, the prison of anger, or the prison of stress.   Whatever your prison is named it is hard to escape from it.

What prison do you find yourself in?   What are you doing to cross the deadline?

unconscious living

“There are many wonderful things that will never be done if you do not do them.”   Charles D. Gill

“But, I can’t” … you’ve heard this before, maybe those are the words you uttered as well, “I can’t ….”, and if you ask why you might hear the words that are tied to a fear.    Often the words “I can’t” are spoken before there is any conscious thought.  It is as if “I can’t” rolls off the tongue with a high degree of practice, and it does.

What does “I can’t” speak to?   It speaks to fear, a fear of failure, a fear of success or a fear of loss.   “I can’t” really says I am not ready to make a change in my life because I am afraid of what the result could be and that result could be less favorable than I desire.   (It might cost money I don’t have, or It might cause me to lose something I can’t afford to lose right now, or It might make me feel bad, or It might make me look bad, or …. ).

In many cases there are words that we speak that we don’t create but rather words that are spoken in reaction to an event or a thought.   When our language becomes a reflex rather than a response we have trained our brain to do something without thinking about it.   It happens every day.  If you drive a car there is a lot of the driving process which has been pushed out of conscious thought to the point that driving can be unconscious.  (Think about the last time  you drove somewhere and don’t remember the journey).

Let’s say you have made a declaration to create success in your life.  To do that means that you are choosing the unknown.   To make a large shift in your life will push you in a direction in which you are not familiar and that generates fear.   To make steps forward means stepping into areas in which you have little or no experience and means making a choice to live consciously by making small effective choices to advance you in the direction you want to go.

To shift from unconscious living to conscious living is having an important goal, a goal that can become a driving force in your life.   What is your big goal that you are working towards?    Are you letting your programmed response to life stop you or are you taking the steps you need to take to grow and succeed?

i’ll start tomorrow …

“We intend to take action when the idea strikes us. We
intend to do something when the emotion is high. But if
we don’t translate that intention into action fairly soon,
the urgency starts to diminish. A month from now the
passion is cold. A year from now it can’t be found. “
Jim Rohn

Tomorrow … that is when I’ll start, tomorrow.   It is easy to put off for another day, another week, another month, another year the things you would like to do.  Somehow something else slips in the way.   Maybe it is a good TV show that you really like to watch.   Of course it is easier to watch the show than to exercise.   Maybe tomorrow.

Tomorrow never arrives.   It is a placeholder in our lives, it is an excuse to put off the hard work it takes to really make the difference in  your life.  I’ve met a lot of people who have put off today the thing that would make their life better. I’ll get to it tomorrow.    Eventually after many years the stories change from the things I did to the things I could have done.   “Only if …,  only if I had more time …, only if I had more money,  only if I was in shape, only if I knew more, only if …”

The “only if” story is the story about putting off today and believing it will be done tomorrow.  Really, tomorrow!    Is it really going to start tomorrow.

One of the greatest regrets that people have is that they “didn’t” go for it when they could have.   That means taking action on the idea when you are passionate about it.   Waiting for tomorrow for most people means not doing it at all.

A great idea can’t wait for tomorrow.   Take action today.

“The critical ingredient is getting off your butt and doing something. It’s as simple as that. A lot of people have ideas, but there are few who decide to do something about them now. Not tomorrow. Not next week. But today. The true entrepreneur is a doer, not a dreamer. ”   Robert Browning

Today is the day

“We would rather be ruined than changed.
We would rather die in our dread
Than climb the cross of the present
And let our illusions die.”  W.H.Auden, The Age of Anxiety

What would it be like if you could really be who you are?

It sounds like a broken record doesn’t it?   Who are you really?  Take a look in the mirror and instead of just looking at the face that looks back at you look deeper.   What kind of life are you living?   If you are like 30% of the adult population you aren’t living the life you want.   Thirty percent of adults (100 million or so people) are not living the life they want to live.   They aren’t being real with themselves.   It is easy to fall into a routine and do what you did yesterday even if it doesn’t have any meaning, doing it over again is better than not doing anything.

If life doesn’t hold much meaning, isn’t much to talk about and feels kind of blah then you aren’t doing yourself any favors.   You are just existing and life is more than just existing don’t you think?

For “most” people life is hard.  It is hard work to live life and it takes more work to enjoy it.   So what do people do, they give up when the going gets tough.  They delay decisions that would lead to a better life cause where they are at the moment is at least known, and that means there is some comfort for them.  Why not break away from the “comfort” zone and start walking the path towards the “living” zone.

Look in the mirror again and what do you see.   Do you see a fake copy of who you really are?    Who do you really want to be?   Knock off that veneer, remove the walls that surround you and really look inside, what is there?   Kind of scary isn’t it?

The remedy to living a ho-hum life is taking action.   It is breaking free of the years of excuses and “could’s”, “should’s” and “would’s” to “will” and “can”  and doing  something today.    It is hard to break free of the habits that you are so used to.  It is hard to focus on setting new goals for your life when you feel safe where you are right now.

Don’t have any goals, then create one.  Make it a big one, make it big enough that it is kind of scary to tell others, make it that big.   Then tell people you are going  to “do it”, make the declaration to do something big.   Make that change that you have always wanted to do but decided it couldn’t be done.

After you set the goal, tell everyone about the goal, then start working that goal.  The hard step, the action step, this is what people put back in the closet after a few days.  It take regular, and repeated action to achieve any goal.   If there is no commitment and action it really doesn’t matter what the goal is, it won’t get done.  Now, what are you waiting for?

mediocre me …

“People who are unable to motivate themselves must be content with mediocrity, no matter how impressive their other talents.”
Andrew Carnegie

mediocre - lacking exceptional quality or ability; “a novel of average merit”; “only a fair performance of the sonata”; “in fair health”; “the caliber of the students has gone from mediocre to above average”; “the performance was middling at best”

Maybe you know someone that lives a life of mediocrity.   What has that life brought them?   Is the mediocre life the kind of life that you would want to live?

Take a look at mediocrity, is this what you want?

People what to live extraordinary lives and at the same time rarely take the steps to live outside of mediocrity.   Think about the tons of self-help books that exist and the tons of self-help programs that are available and think about the vast ocean of self-help CD’s.   People buy the programs, read the books, listen to the CD’s and return to mediocrity.   What are you doing to live a life that is beyond mediocrity?

When was the last time you talked to someone who would work with you to move towards an exciting, positive rewarding goal?   When was the last time you took your life seriously?

What can you do to move beyond mediocrity?

1. Turn off the TV.  There is nothing on TV that adds value to your life.  What is there subtracts value from your life. 
2. Get the right amount of rest.   Get 7-8 hours of sleep per night.  Sleep is necessary to be fully alive during the day, mentally and physically alive.
3. Start exercising.  Even if it is just for a few minutes get out and start a regular program of exercise.  Find someone who can exercise with you if exercising alone isn’t your thing.   Moving is important for mental and physical capacity.   Life is stressful as it is and exercising is just one way to lower the stress.
4. Eat the right foods.   So many of the problems people face today are lifestyle choices.   Diabetes is a lifestyle choice for the most part.   People can either choose to eat low cost high calorie diets or they can choose to eat foods that are healthy. 
5. Create a plan for your life.   Mediocrity stems from drifting through each day.   There may be a goal but in most cases it is just getting through today and then doing it over again.  It is no wonder that people are “checking out” and finding TV as a way to get away.   Create a plan and start working on those goals.   Start with a 5 year plan and define what it is and where you want to be in five years.
6. Improve you.   Spend the time and energy to improve who you are and the skills you need to be successful in the world today.   The “old” world, the old way, are gone.   It takes new skills, new abilities and new ways of thinking to compete in today’s global economy.  Become an expert.  Sometimes it takes digging deep into who you are to find out what it is that really makes you come alive.  Find out what it is and then start moving forward.
7. Read.   Reading is an easy, inexpensive way to improve your personal results.    Start reading the kind of things that improve your value to yourself and others.

8. Get help.  Work with someone to push you towards higher levels of performance.  Doing it by yourself isn’t working is it?   Getting more out of life in this fast paced world isn’t going to happen if you have to do it alone.  Maybe a few people are able to push through the briars and thorns but most people aren’t able to move in the direction they want alone.

9.  Make the time.   So many people say, “I don’t have the time to ….” and it’s true.   There is less and less time for “you” because of all the distractions that you can sign up for.   It takes time to go to the gym, it takes time to prepare meals, it takes time to get ready for work, it takes time to do the household chores, it takes time for everything but “YOU” and “YOU” are important aren’t you?   Make the time to take the time for you.   If it is one day a week, take that time to focus on bettering you.

10.  It costs too much.   It costs too much to be mediocre?  Improving yourself, either with coaching, attending programs, and working on being excellent will improve your life.  It takes time and it might cost money.   If you can pay for cable TV, if you can pay for “extras”,  if you can pay for things you don’t “need”, then it isn’t about the costs.  It is about the priorities  you are making for yourself.

In 5 years where do you want to be?   Do you want to be living a life of mediocrity?   Make a choice and start living beyond mediocrity today.

“Man often becomes what he believes himself to be.   If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it even if I may not have it at the beginning.”  Mahatma Gandhi

to live means to ….

“Don’t ask yourself what the world needs; ask yourself what makes you come alive. And then go and do that. Because what the world needs is people who have come alive.” Harold Whitman

One of the phrases I hear quite often is “If I”.   If I had more money my life would be better.  If I had a better job my life would be better.  ”If I”.   It’s a slow death sentence to an unlived life.

What would happen if you replaced “If I” with “When I”.   Not “if I” could do this or that, but rather “When I”.   Take control of your life.  Instead of living life as if each moment were a mystery start creating a vision statement.    Take that vision statement and translate that into a set of goals that extent out 5 to 10 years.   Write down the goals in “BIG”  letters, yes big letters.   Make it visible to you and to others.  Let them know you are going to go “BIG” and start living your life as you really want to.

Living BIG doesn’t mean living foolishly it means creating a set of plans that are achievable, doable and lead towards your vision.   It means living with constancy of purpose and having the ability to work through the hard times.  It means celebrating success along the way even if it is only a small, small step.   Moving forward is not always easy so be patient and keep pushing forward.    It is those who break through those barriers and hurdle the trials that reach their vision.

When a vision, a compelling vision is reached it doesn’t mean that it is the end.  It really is just a new beginning.  When the vision is realized a new vision, a new mission is created that will raise you to a new level of living.

How do you start living?  (If you need a clue watch the video)

1. Make a commitment to yourself that you will define your purpose.

2. Create that purpose for your life.
- Take a walk and bring with you a pad of paper.  Find a place where you can be alone and in the quiet, in the serenity of the moment think about what you really want to do and be.   Write down your thoughts and observe trends, patterns and ideas.   What is the same about them and what is unique?   Star the ones that make your heart beat a bit faster.
- Refine the list, get the key things from your list.  Put the  ”doables” in one column and put the “reach for the stars” in another and put the routine items in a third column.
- What made it into the “reach for the stars column”.?
- Choose the most compelling, most awesome, most powerful ideas and write a goal statement.

-   I am going to ________________________ in 5 years.
- Write a story that describes this ultimate dream of yours.   What does it really look like to you.   What will it take to make it real?   What new skills will you need?  What risks will you take?   What will require change?
-  Be clear about what you want.   Be crystal clear.

3. Tell others what you are going to do or change.  Make it BIG.

4. Make it real  (start doing)

5.  Give of yourself to others.

When you create your “Start Living Plan” you may notice that you pull back from it believing it isn’t possible or it is foolish to believe in such great things.   Work towards the goal, even if it is only for 15 minutes a day.  Take a few minutes each day and work on the goal.   Turn off the distractions, the TV or whatever pushes you away from the pursuit of the dream.   If you want the dream to be realized sooner put more effort into it.

If you aren’t sure which way to go, enlist a coach to work with you.   A coach can hold you accountable and keep those commitments in the forefront of your mind.  Fighting the battle alone is one of the reasons so many people give up on their dreams before they start.   Be one of the ones that makes your dream come real.

“All successful people men and women are big dreamers. They imagine what their future could be, ideal in every respect, and then they work every day toward their distant vision, that goal or purpose.”  Brian Tracy