Category Archives: what if

release the inner worrier

“If you have fear of some pain or suffering, you should examine whether there is anything you can do about it. If you can, there is no need to worry about it; if you cannot do anything, then there is also no need to worry.”
― Dalai Lama XIV

SONY DSC

What does worry accomplish?  As far as I know worry has accomplished nothing. Either there is a way to solve a problem or there isn’t and worry does nothing to help solve the problem.

Worry is the anticipation of a negative outcome based on a story that you strongly believe.   For most people I simply ask them, “Is that story true?”   Most people don’t believe the story is true and so I ask them, “How will worry help you?”  The usual answer, “It won’t”.

So, “Why worry?”

The big challenge is trying to release the “what if” thoughts the mind can conjure up.  The mind is looking for some way to brace for a potential negative outcome.  In other words “fear”.    Fear downs out the hope of today in exchange for the uncertainty of tomorrow.

Release the worry and replace it with practical actions you can take.  Understand what you have control over and what you don’t.  If you can’t control it or change the circumstances you’ve been placed in worry won’t help you.    A student may worry about getting a good grade on a test.  In that situation they have control over what they study and review to improve their chances of doing well.    Worry won’t help them do better or even prepare to take the test.

Think about the situation you face.   What is the best action you can take?  What do you have control over?

Making a difference and you can

“One person can make a difference, and everyone should try.”

 John F. Kennedy

water

It takes a few helping hands to make a difference and maybe you can help.  You are looking at a picture outside Kashari, Uganda.

Zion Kids Palace Nursery School – Kashari, Mbarara

There is a school there that is being run by Herbert Tushabe and Rachael Nsimenta in a rural part of Uganda and they are on a mission to help the children in this area thrive.

Here is their story in their words:

Racheal and I , undertook a decision to tackle this challenge in July 2012  With a few tools and resources that were  available, we  started Zion with an emphasis  to bring long-lasting measurable social change to an urgent social need for the people in and around Rwobuyenje Kakiika -Kashari.
 Due to lack of affordable and accessible early learning and childhood development Centers and  the demand around its  neighborhood (more than 800 children between age 3 and 6)  don’t access early childhood learning (KG education) because the cost of  doing this is so high not mentioning the transportation of  these kids to and from the available  schools in town which costs so much that the poor peasantry parents in this area can’t afford and hence the vulnerability of this young rural children in this area, so they wait to join directly to primary school at age 9 or 10.
After witnessing the adversities that children in these  villages encountered, even when  those parents that struggled to do so would use motorcycles to ferry

Transport

toddlers to school very early in the morning  (6 or 7 -3 year olds) on one motorcycle very early in the morning ,that cold…I  was moved. Inspiration struck through the startup of  this facility so that these services can be availed to these people so accessible and affordable.
Nearly after 3 years of  involvement, our  dedication grew, and has manifested itself into the a Community Based center -Zion Kids Palace.   Four  teachers,Racheal Nsimenta, and Mr Tushabe Herbert  are now running  a full early learning   center with 100 kids ,providing them a full KG program with lunch and breakfast.
The philosophy,  teach man how to  fish, and  feed him for a lifetime’ fueled Racheal and I to found Zion. That philosophy still drives our mission to  enhance and lift quality of education during early learning stages at the Grass-root. Our desire is that these children will grow active and creative minds, develop a passion for others, and have the courage to act on their beliefs.We focus on the total development of each child’s spiritual, moral, intellectual, social, and physical growth via a faith-based perspective.
What do they need?   They need funds to expand the program, to build a school and provide safe transportation for the kids along with materials such as books and toys to improve the outcomes of the school.
Here’s what you can do.   You can donate to the program.   You can tell others, you can pass this link on to others.   One dollar will make a difference.   Give a dollar and pass the message to 10 other people.  Let Herbert and Rachael change the world for the kids they serve.    Will you do that today?
You can play a small part and make a difference that will last a lifetime.

Thank-you!   Please send the link to fund the project to those you know.

inside out

“Your visions will become clear only when you can look into your own heart. Who looks outside, dreams; who looks inside, awakes.” ― C.G. Jung

SONY DSC

Does work give you your identity?    For many people the title they have, the job they have or the work they do is tied to who they are.    It creates problems when there is a job loss or a significant change.   The job title is a sense of pride, a sense of accomplishment or a way to feel valuable and sometimes it becomes a crutch for the ego.

If your identity is based on the work you do then is that what you want?

Are you doing what you believe is your true purpose?   Think about that for a minute.   If you don’t have a purpose what are you chasing?

change your life …

“In the past, I always used to be looking for answers. Today, I know there are only questions. So I just live.” ― Sarah Brightman

MINOLTA DIGITAL CAMERA

To see our lives in a different way is to ask questions.    Often all we seek are answers to questions rather than asking the bigger questions to see what answers  come to us.

How often have you been the source of answers?   Do people come to you asking you questions so that they can quickly get back to doing their work or are you the one who asks others to answer your questions?

Questions open up the imagination.   Being able to be open about what types of responses that you could get or you already know may reveal the answers you really were looking for.

Many people are looking for ways to have a happier more joyful life.   Maybe they are seeking new work, work that they can engage in and use their strengths and talents in ways they aren’t able to today.     I’ve seen people that are making good money with great benefits, good work arrangement and find work terribly frustrating and are willing to work for less to have less stress.   What is the question?

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

1. What works in my life?

2. What do I really want?

3. What are my choices?

4. What’s possible?

5. What am I responsible for?

What are big questions?

it ends today …

“A very small percentage of the people in this world will actually experience and live today. So many people will be stuck on another day, another time that traumatized them and caused them to spiritually stutter so they miss out on this day.”
Steve Maraboli

Stop it right now!

That’s right stop it.

Stop waiting for your life to begin.   Many people, people like you are just waiting for something to change.   Waiting, waiting and waiting.   Nothing happens, tomorrow will be the same as today if you don’t take action.

Life doesn’t happen to you, you make life happen.

I work with people who are stuck in a “can I do it tomorrow pattern?”.     When does tomorrow really appear?   Never, it is really easy to put it off again.

What dreams, what desires, or what plans do you have that are waiting for tomorrow?

An idea needs so energy so that it can blossom, that energy is called activation energy.   It is the same amount of energy that it takes to spring out of bed once the alarm has gone off.    How do you get out of bed?    Does it take multiple slaps of the snooze button before your toes touch the floor?   It does for a lot of people.   Hitting that snooze alarm over and over again is like waiting for tomorrow to come.

Do you believe you have the potential to do something new with your life?   Do you think that you can do whatever you really put your mind to?   Most people can do what they really want to do.    If you have a big enough WHY  you can do just about anything.   A big WHY followed by ACTION will generate a result.   Is the WHY big enough, will it drive you through tough times to achieve the result you want?

It is like going on a diet.   The WHY is to be healthy, alive and invigorated.   What happens is that the results are slow to come and then the belief that you can lose weight shrinks, and that shrinking belief lowers your potential to achieve a result so you quit taking action and the result is you don’t lose any weight.   It is a self-fulfilling prophecy.   Lose at a diet and you believe that you could lose at everything and as long as you believe that it becomes your truth.

Wouldn’t you like to turn that around?   Would you like to complete those things you attempt to start and create a positive momentum of great results?   You would wouldn’t you.

A flower blooms because it has a big enough WHY.   It’s your turn now.   Start today, start living the life you really want to live.

your words

“One of the fundamental differences between the Victim Orientation and this one [Creator] is where you put your focus of attention…For Victims, the focus is always on what they don’t want: the problems that seem constantly to multiply in their lives. They don’t want the person, condition, or circumstance they consider their Persecutor, and they don’t want the fear that leads to fight, flee or freeze reactions, either. Creators, on the other hand, place their focus on what they do want. Doing this, Creators still face and solve problems in the course of creating outcomes they want, but their focus remains fixed on their ultimate vision.”   David Emerald   

Are your words the words of power and creation or are they words that take away any power that you thought you have?   There are words that command action, that create change and show commitment.  For many people using words that create action is pretty scary.   If they use words of commitment they are also choosing to be responsible and many people just don’t want to be responsible.

There are basically two classes of people, owner’s and victim’s.    The victim is always looking the world from a point of view that would suggest the “world” is doing something to them.   The owner looks at the world as an opportunity to create something new.

The language of the victim is riddled with words like “ought”, “should”, “need”, “have to”, “could”, “might”, “try”, “if”,”but”, and “hope to”.    These are words that lack ownership and responsibility.   They are words that have an escape clause built into them.   “I said I was going to ‘try’ to get that done for you”, or ” I should get it done”, or “I need to go to work”, and those sentences are just an easy way to say, “I am not ready to be responsible.”    What words are you using?

The words of the owner, the person who is responsible for their life,  are “will”, “commit”, “want to”, “desire to”, “resolve to”,  and “act on”,  and those words show commitment to doing things versus maybe thinking about doing something in the future.    The owner takes the reins of today and doesn’t promise that “I’ll get to that tomorrow”.    When does tomorrow come?

Think about the language you are using.   Is it filled with “if’s” and “but’s” or is it filled with words that demand action.    It is easy to get into the habit of being a victim and staying there.   It takes work to become the creative owner of your life and it starts with the words you choose to use.   What words will you start using today?