rejected again

“Over the years, I have come to realize that the greatest trap in our life is not success, popularity, or power, but self-rejection. Success, popularity, and power can indeed present a great temptation, but their seductive quality often comes from the way they are part of the much larger temptation to self-rejection. When we have come to believe in the voices that call us worthless and unlovable, then success, popularity, and power are easily perceived as attractive solutions. The real trap, however, is self-rejection. As soon as someone accuses me or criticizes me, as soon as I am rejected, left alone, or abandoned, I find myself thinking, “Well, that proves once again that I am a nobody.” … [My dark side says,] I am no good… I deserve to be pushed aside, forgotten, rejected, and abandoned.” Henri J.M. Nouwen

The answer is “No!” and  you’ve heard this several times in the past week and you believe that it isn’t the question, it is you that is being turned down.  “No” can feel like rejection if it is heard enough times.   Is that true? Is it true that a response to your request that is not favorable to you is a rejection of  you?

Often people find that when there request is denied that it feels like they are being rejected.  The wonderful idea that was rejected was a compilation of many hours of work, and how dare someone say “No” to the idea, project or design.  It just can’t be right, turns into I am not right. What is rejection?   Is it saying “No” or is it saying something else?

There are many people who fail to achieve their best because they feel they will be rejected.  So instead of living fully, they live a life or regret.

Wouldn’t it be better to find out if you could create the life of your dreams?   Wouldn’t it feel better to try and see what could be done?

Believe in “who” you are and accept a “No” with thanks.

Making a difference and you can

“One person can make a difference, and everyone should try.”

 John F. Kennedy

It takes a few helping hands to make a difference and maybe you can help.  You are looking at a picture outside Kashari, Uganda.

Zion Kids Palace Nursery School – Kashari, Mbarara

There is a school there that is being run by Herbert Tushabe and Rachael Nsimenta in a rural part of Uganda and they are on a mission to help the children in this area thrive.

Here is their story in their words:

Racheal and I , undertook a decision to tackle this challenge in July 2012  With a few tools and resources that were  available, we  started Zion with an emphasis  to bring long-lasting measurable social change to an urgent social need for the people in and around Rwobuyenje Kakiika -Kashari.

 Due to lack of affordable and accessible early learning and childhood development Centers and  the demand around its  neighborhood (more than 800 children between age 3 and 6)  don’t access early childhood learning (KG education) because the cost of  doing this is so high not mentioning the transportation of  these kids to and from the available  schools in town which costs so much that the poor peasantry parents in this area can’t afford and hence the vulnerability of this young rural children in this area, so they wait to join directly to primary school at age 9 or 10.

After witnessing the adversities that children in these  villages encountered, even when  those parents that struggled to do so would use motorcycles to ferry

toddlers to school very early in the morning  (6 or 7 -3 year olds) on one motorcycle very early in the morning ,that cold…I  was moved. Inspiration struck through the startup of  this facility so that these services can be availed to these people so accessible and affordable.

Nearly after 3 years of  involvement, our  dedication grew, and has manifested itself into the a Community Based center -Zion Kids Palace.   Four  teachers,Racheal Nsimenta, and Mr Tushabe Herbert  are now running  a full early learning   center with 100 kids ,providing them a full KG program with lunch and breakfast.

The philosophy,  teach man how to  fish, and  feed him for a lifetime’ fueled Racheal and I to found Zion. That philosophy still drives our mission to  enhance and lift quality of education during early learning stages at the Grass-root. Our desire is that these children will grow active and creative minds, develop a passion for others, and have the courage to act on their beliefs.We focus on the total development of each child’s spiritual, moral, intellectual, social, and physical growth via a faith-based perspective.

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What do they need?   They need funds to expand the program, to build a school and provide safe transportation for the kids along with materials such as books and toys to improve the outcomes of the school.

Here’s what you can do.   You can donate to the program.   You can tell others, you can pass this link on to others.   One dollar will make a difference.   Give a dollar and pass the message to 10 other people.  Let Herbert and Rachael change the world for the kids they serve.    Will you do that today?

You can play a small part and make a difference that will last a lifetime.

Thank-you!   Please send the link to fund the project to those you know.

what’s your problem?

“And once the storm is over, you won’t remember how you made it through, how you managed to survive. You won’t even be sure, whether the storm is really over. But one thing is certain. When you come out of the storm, you won’t be the same person who walked in. That’s what this storm’s all about.”
Haruki Murakami

Yes, you do have a problem.   The problem is being authentic and not pretending to be someone you are not.   It happens at work, it happens at home, it happens almost everywhere you go.   Being authentic, being who you really are is difficult to do when you are trying to meet the expectations of others. The lack of authenticity shows up at work as doing what you don’t really want to do and doing it because you have to.   It rubs against the very nature of who you are and slowly you change the work to match your strengths.

Personal relationships can be ruined by the lack of authenticity as well.  Marriages will fail if the partners hide behind inauthentic behaviors.   Saying one thing and doing another or pretending to be a person you are not just to prevent loneliness creates a new set of problems that will need to be dealt with. It takes courage to be authentic and reveal the real issues that one faces to others.

For those who can be authentic is the reward of freedom and happiness.  The amount of work that it requires to hide from your own reality creates a great deal of internal stress and unhappiness.   Fear keeps people from being authentic and fear is what creates the masks of deception.

So, what are your problems?  What masks are you hiding behind?  What is it costing you?