ain’t got no satisfaction

“True happiness is to enjoy the present, without anxious dependence upon the future, not to amuse ourselves with either hopes or fears but to rest satisfied with what we have, which is sufficient, for he that is so wants nothing. The greatest blessings of mankind are within us and within our reach. A wise man is content with his lot, whatever it may be, without wishing for what he has not.”
― Seneca

 

How would you describe your life right now?   Satisfied, happy, joyful, content or would it be more like stressed, overworked. anxious, unhappy, confused, bored, consumed, or angry?

What would you say about your life today?   What do you want to say about your life?

Ponder those questions, give them some thought and really try to determine where you are in life today.

If you are satisfied, content and enjoying life you’re probably one of a few that do.  Many people are finding themselves more stressed and more discontent than ever before.   If you are one of the many who find themselves highly stressed what are you doing about it?   What steps are you taking to lower the total stress in your life?

To de-stress consider eating better, getting eight hours of sleep and adding exercise to your daily routine.  At work, get up and move every hour for a few minutes, do some deep breathing and stretch.   Schedule time each day to relax and do something enjoyable.   For some people de-stressing includes doing something for others (volunteering) and for others a long quiet walk will do the trick.

If you are stressed take action to lower that stress load.  The impact of negative stress over time can impact your health and well-being.   Notice the warning signs of stress – fatigue, increased anger, impatience, depression, or sadness and take action to lower the stress in your life.

If you’re not satisfied with your life as it is – take action to make some changes.  Take action to lower the stress that may be impacting our quality of life and start today.

 

i want it now …

“Many persons have a wrong idea of what constitutes true happiness. It is not attained through self-gratification but through fidelity to a worthy purpose.”
Helen Keller

Best Milkshakes on the East Coast … it’s true!
We live in a society where withholding gratification is no longer seen as something worth doing.   Instead we chip away at our ability to withstand challenge by succumbing to the idea that we should be happy and free of stress all of the time.

You can see self-gratification play out on our roads where people decide that passing on the shoulder is acceptable.   We live in a time where our video game mentality is played out in real life.   We strive to get more and more dopamine (the feel good hormone) released into our brain.

Let’s say you want something, something nice, how long will you wait until you have it?   For most people the anticipation of waiting creates a strong desire to have it now.   It might be that we are driven by primitive urges to satisfy our cravings quickly before the opportunity has been lost.   We are still thinking that we are going to be chased by a large cat and if we don’t take care of our urges now we won’t be able to ever.   How true is that?

Sale, 50% off, today only!   It’s cool, it’s hot, and you have to have it NOW!   These are tricks that your brain plays on you to get you to do things that you don’t really need to do.    The promise of a reward is powerfully alluring and marketers know precisely which buttons to push to get you to act on desire rather than need.    The message is if you have this thing today you’ll be happier, you’ll be satisfied,  and you’ll gratified.

Test yourself and see what your resistance is to waiting for something you desire.    What are the tricks being used to cause you to make a decision to trigger a release of dopamine?

Black Friday, shopping early and even earlier is a big rush for many people, the thrill is in the purchase and ultimately a dopamine rush.     If our tasks and our work doesn’t fill us with dopamine we wait, we wait and wait and wait until we don’t have a choice and then it gets done.

What are your “feel good” things you do?    What do you notice about them?  What is your level of resistance to withhold self-gratification?

To learn more about the brain and the production of dopamine look at this video.

Three ways to increase happiness

“Happiness is like a butterfly which, when pursued, is always beyond our grasp, but, if you will sit down quietly, may alight upon you.”  Nathaniel Hawthorne

Happiness is something many people strive for and fail to achieve.   Happiness can be elusive to some and easy to obtain for others.   A new film called “Happy” is documenting happiness, where it is found and how people live a life of happiness.

Recent research provides some steps to achieve greater happiness.   The study of happiness is growing and is a reflection of the positive psychology movement and the strengths movement.  Markus Buckingham one of the leaders in the strengths movement shows people why strengths are important in this short video.   People that use their strengths are happier.   Don’t know your strengths then got to viastrengths and find out what your strengths are.

Another aspect of happiness is purpose.    Having a purpose increases happiness.   Knowing who you are what you are gifted at doing and having the ability to use those gifts increases happiness.    If you haven’t found your purpose or aren’t sure you have a purpose take a look at this.   See if you can figure out your purpose, you’ll be happier when you do have a defined purpose.

The third element of happiness is developing relationships.    Relationships that work well increase happiness.  As we approach the holiday season many people feel stressed due to the fact many relationships aren’t what they should be.   Here are some hints on dealing with broken relationships.

Three steps to increase happiness.

1. Know your purpose

2. Strong and deep relationships

3. Knowing and using your strengths.

What are you doing to increase your happiness?   Happiness is part choice, part development and to some degree inherited qualities.   Choose to be happier.  Choose to develop your strengths and choose to develop deep and meaningful relationships and you will be happier.    Maybe you have a story about how you found happiness, what is it?

What would help you most?

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE:

Get your life under control with Life Coaching

COLORADO SPRINGS, CO, May 07, 2011 — Life and Business coach Dan Weigold will be appearing on the nationally broadcast show “The Balancing Act” May 11,2011 on Lifetime Television to talk about how coaching can be used to accelerate success, regain balance and produce greater happiness for working women.

Life and Business coaching has gained national recognition as a tool to help people manage the increased stress are experiencing in their lives, to help them discover what they truly want out their careers and lives.   Executive Coaching has been a mainstay for top level managers for years and now access to this high quality tool is available to anyone seeking positive change in their lives.  

Dan Weigold is a Personal Development and Empowerment coach at Coach with Heart works with people who desire to make significant change in their business or life.   Dan works with individuals or organizations that want to be able to integrate and process the amount of change that is occurring now so that they can be prepared for the future.

 To make an appointment or to find out more about coaching contact send email to coachwithheart@gmail.com or visit danweigold.com.  Those without internet access can call 719.660.1103

Dan Weigold, Coach with HEART has been serving clients since 2008 and is a member of the Denver Coaching Federation and the International Coaching Federation. 

The show airs 5:00am MDT, 6:00am EDT, PDT on Lifetime Television.

# # #

10 things … for a better you

“Far better is it to dare mighty things, to win glorious triumphs, even though checkered by failure…than to rank with those poor spirits who neither enjoy much nor suffer much, because they live in a gray twilight that knows not victory nor defeat. ” Theodore Roosevelt

 

There are a lot of unhappy people in America today.   Worker satisfaction is at a low point with large numbers of people thinking about looking for something else to do.    Job satisfaction is a very important criteria for overall personal well-being and happiness.

1. Find work that is in alignment with your strengths and personality.

2. Have regular authentic and genuine conversations with your manager/supervisor/leader.    (Sometimes this won’t be possible, so ensure you have a trusted person you can speak to in your organization).   People leave organizations where they supervisor is supportive of you.

3. Be authentic.  Why be a fake, be the genuine you even thought you might believe it is difficult.   Being authentic means that you are being honest with yourself and your abilities.   Accept who you are and find what works for you.

3. Be transparent.   Transparency in life means being able to express “who” you are without putting on a mask.   People can see that you are the real deal, not a fake, that you are sincere and are able to do what you say.   Being transparent will allow you to experience less stress in your life.

4. Eat well.   Everyone has stress and some people have a lot of stress.  Find healthy foods and eat more of them.   Diets filled with poor quality calories are leading people to eating more than they need and that leads to poor health in many people.    Good health is less expensive than poor health.    Save money by eating right and losing weight.  

5. Exercise often.   Exercise was part of life not long ago.  Today more and more people spend their day sitting.    Lack of exercise reduces overall strength and health.   Exercise consumes some of the stress hormones the body produces.   Exercise also help people sleep better at night.  

6.  Get enough rest.  People are cramming more and more into each day and cutting back on sleep.   The lack of adequate rest can lower your individual stress threshold making you more vulnerable to stressful events that occur in each day.  

7. Be grateful.   Look around at what is going right in your life.  Notice a sunset and sunrise.   Just take a deep breath and relax in the moment.  Find peace.  Is there a roof over your head, food to eat and clothes to wear.   Sometimes just the basics are overlooked.  

8.  Be thankful.   Thank someone today.   Find a reason to give thanks.   Find someone to thank each day.

9.  Find a reason to smile.   Now if you really can’t find a reason to smile, smile at someone else.  Just smile for the fun of it and see what happens.   Smile to enlighten someone else.   Maybe a smile will cause a giggle to burst out or a laugh.  What is so funny when you smile about nothing at all?

10. Take time out for you.   Find a time, 10 minutes, 15 minutes and just stop doing and start doing nothing.   Just reflect and sit back and relax.   Do this alone, and do it quietly.   Do it each day, form a new habit for yourself.  Quiet the mind for you.

 

“Happiness consists more in small conveniences of pleasures that occur every day, than in great pieces of good fortune that happen but seldom to a man in the course of his life.”
Benjamin Franklin

Stamp of approval

What do people need?

Simple – to know that someone cares about them.

Take a look at validation.

Get your stamp of approval.

Who can you validate today?

dancin’ in the rain

Take a look – what can the power of gratitude do for you?

Dance in the rain!

Dance to your dreams!

Dance to your aspirations!

Dance to your creative spirit!

Dance to a new idea!

Dance for happiness!

Dance today!

 

“Life’s not about waiting for the storm to pass…It’s about learning to dance in the rain!”

 

your thought patterns

In the past researchers focused on negative thought patterns and depression and now researchers like Martin Seligman, Tal Ben Shahar, Sonja Lyubomirsky and Gretchen Rubin are focusing on positive thinking.

 

When a negative thought enters your mind what do you do with it?  Do you dwell on it as if it were true?   Take an example from your past, a time when a negative thought just turned over and over in your mind.   What was that thought?  

Evaluate the thought through the prism of these four questions to see if the thought is true.

1. Is the thought true?
2. Can you absolutely know that it is true?
3. How do you feel when you have that thought?
4. Who would you be or what would you feel if it you didn’t have that thought?

Now, reverse the thought and change it to its opposite.

1. Is the thought false?
2. Can you absolutely know that it is false?
3. How do you feel when you have that thought?
4. What would you be or what would you feel if you did something with this thought?

 

 

Which scenario is more valid, the positive thought or the negative thought?   Which thought has the possibility of creating a better mood and better outcome?

Take time to think about the positive outcomes and your life will become more positive as a result.

Kindness works best when

“Kindness is a language we all understand.  Even the blind can see it and the deaf can hear it.” 
                                                                                    Mother Teresa 
 

How do you spread kindness?   How do you encourage others to reach their full potential?   When was the last time you were encouraged, thanked, appreciated, or acknowledged?

If you have been acknowledged recently those around you probably haven’t been either.   What a great way to start a trend – acknowledge those around you and see what happens.   Brighten their day to brighten yours!

my inner life is …

“the man who has no inner life is the slave to his surroundings”
Henri Frederic Amiel

What does your inner life look like?

Peace

Joy

Happiness

Contentment

Serenity

Synchronicity

Convergence

Filled

 

What words describe what your deepest feelings are?   Does anything on the list above strike a chord with you?