living beyond the ordinary

“Ordinary people believe only in the possible. Extraordinary people visualize not what is possible or probable, but rather what is impossible. And by visualizing the impossible, they begin to see it as possible”
― Cherie Carter-Scott

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What kind of life are you living right now?   Is it the kind of life you really want or are you looking for something that would make your life more than just ordinary, plain, a dull grey rather than a life that is wonder filled, exciting and full of color.

Which column of words below describes your life?

Ordinary Extraordinary
Comfortable Uncomfortable
Reactive Proactive
Fearful Fearless
The easy way the right way
Self-centered Other-centered
Risk adverse Risk tolerant
What’s in it for me We all win
Closed Minded Open Minded
Resigned Engaged
Victim Creator
Stingy Generous
Judgmental Acceptance
Waiting Acting

What are you intentionally doing to make your life better?

What are you taking charge of?   What will it take so that you can start living an extraordinary life?

Step outside of your comfort zone and explore living  with feeling, with zest, with abundance, with a sense of being alive and with a sense of excitement.  Think about where you are right now and where you could be, what is it that you really want?  Set the intention and take action today.

support or challenge

“If you are facing a new challenge or being asked to do something that you have never done before don’t be afraid to step out. You have more capability than you think you do but you will never see it unless you place a demand on yourself for more.”   Joyce Meyer

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Are you being challenged at work and in life?   What are you challenged by?   Now, by challenge think about in the sense of growth and learning rather than hardship and stress.

Leaders create challenging environments for followers.   The provide roles or opportunities that challenge the skills, intelligence and strengths of their followers.   You may have seen that in some aspect of your life where you were given challenges that forced you to grow, what was that like?

Some people who act as leaders provide too much challenge and that challenge is in the form of intimidation, too many rules and threats.   These types of leaders are often unaware of their behaviors and the impact they are having on their followers.

“We live by encouragement and die without it — slowly, sadly, and angrily.”
― Celeste Holm

Leaders also provide support, the kind that is encouraging and motivating as that fuels accomplishment.   Do you remember a time when someone supported your dreams and desires and encouraged you to seek after your dreams?   A leader will recognize your strengths and challenge you to fully realize them.

The danger for a leader though is not to provide so much support that there is no challenge or no opportunity to grow.   To much support and result in laziness or complacency.

The leader is seeking to understand how great a challenge and how much support each of their followers needs and creates a vision that empowers the followers to achieve great things.

When was the last time you felt supported and challenged in your endeavors?

searching for harmonic resonance

“Resonance happens when your mind and heart come into sync.”
― Ravindra Shukla

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Have you had that experience where time and your mind and body are in alignment and things just work?    Life seems easy in that moment, balance, harmonic, filled with momentum and filled with peace at the same time.   Have you had that happen to you?

What would it feel like to be able to step into that space where your head and heart and were at peace with each other?   It could be an authentic creative space that may be able to suspend the past and the future for a moment and allow you to fully experience being in the present, in the moment, no worries, no fear, just a feeling of peace.

The idea is to find harmony within yourself and within nature and then let the two merge together so there is this resonance of life in that moment.

The words of Ed Viswanathan, “All matter, including you and I, has rhythmic movement within it and our quest should be to create a proper rhythmic harmony within ourselves…you feel happy when you sit near an ocean because your vibrations try to synchronize with the frequency of the waves.” , echo that resonate peace.

When do you feel at peace with you?   When are you in harmony with nature?

When was the last time you felt a sense of serenity and joy?

knowing your blind spots

“As a leader, 1st, work on yourself- increase your self-awareness. There shouldn’t be any other urgent agenda than this. Get enlightened! Know very well who you’re including your strengths, weaknesses, and blind spots!”
― Assegid Habtewold

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Everyone has blind spots in their lives, an area that they are unaware of and how it can impact other people.  Some people exploit blind spots to gain control or have an advantage of another person.    Finding out what the blind spots are, being aware gives you a chance to live a better life.

In business executives work with coaches to help them reveal their blind spots, poor communications, anger management, overwhelm, time management, focus and more, can derail a career.   Knowing what those blind spots are opportunities for getting better results.

Not everyone wants to know what their blind spots are and yet knowing them, being aware of what might cause problems, is valuable.   Being blind to what others see can impact relationships, careers and friendships.

What can you do to increase personal awareness?

Ask others to share what they see when you are emotionally stressed.   Ask them to share what your strengths and weaknesses are.   Those are starting points to revealing the blind spots.

Organizations can have blind spots as well.   People come into the organization and adopt the practices and procedures of an organization and over time lose the opportunity to understand why things are done in a certain way.

What are your blind spots?  How are they affecting you?

break free from the ego

“The most common ego identifications have to do with possessions, the work you do, social status and recognition, knowledge and education, physical appearance, special abilities, relationships, person and family history, belief systems, and often nationalistic, racial, religious, and other collective identifications. None of these is you.”
― Eckhart Tolle

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It was holding him back from being the person he wanted to be.   He wanted more and knew that he had it within to do more and at the end of the day little got done.   The ego held his hand back from making a call, from finishing the last touches on a piece of work, and from realizing his dreams.

I’ve heard from many people the story of wanting more and doing less.   The ego always stepped in fear filled and delayed action.   Procrastination is a sign of an ego that is not pleased with past results.  Perfectionism always says it isn’t good enough.   The ego fears rejection and would rather see things delayed or not getting done at all seeped in a belief that it wouldn’t be good enough.

Courage is the antidote to inaction.   The courage to take action, to push against the ego and see beyond the fear is what will open the door to freedom.    The “ego” that is pushed beyond its own fear will be able to grow.  With growth there are opportunities that were hidden.   The abundant life is behind the door that is being blocked by the ego.

For most people pushing the ego aside so that they can confront their fears is hard to do, it doesn’t happen easily.   Believing that you don’t have what you need to be successful is to believe in the voice of the ego.  Believing that you have what you need now to do what needs to be done is the first step to living an authentic life.

What is the ego saying to you?

What is preventing you from living life fully?

What is stopping you from living out your dreams?

Listen to yourself.  What are the feelings that show up when you read those questions?   What is the truth about you?

“And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.”   Anais Nin

what is respect?

“Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners”
― Laurence Sterne

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A lot of people want more respect.   That must mean a lot of people are experiencing hurt by others.   To respect someone else means not to desire to harm them emotionally and for some people that takes an enormous amount of self-control.

What does respect look like for you?   Take a few minutes and jot down what respect is and what it isn’t.   What does it mean to be respected?   What does it mean to be disrespected?

Respect means to listen to what others say without judgment.  It is to leave right and wrong alone for the moment and just give audience to the one who is speaking.   It doesn’t mean that you approve of what was said.  It means that you have stepped aside of judging and listened wholly.    It is to realize that what they are saying is from their place of understanding and knowing.   They might need to see new things, new approaches and achieve a new level of understanding all of which can be done without condemning the person.

If their ideas and thoughts are not true then what would bring truth into the conversation.  How would you bring a new truth into being for discussion?

The challenge is to do that without offending the person or blaming them but to look at the truth and contemplating a new way of thinking about what was said.  It is often easy to rush to judgment or to elevate your ideas to a level higher than that of the one speaking and that just sets the stage for conflict.

How do you want to be respected?

10 rules to improve performance

Don’t mistake activity with achievement.”
― John Wooden

What rules do you work by or live by?   Are the rules supporting your growth and success or are they pushing you backwards?

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Many people are living by rules they aren’t even aware of.  Rules of living that lead to procrastination, poor time management, small expectations, negative self-talk and worse.   What you do each day is dictated by the rules that govern your life.   If you exercise you have a rule for exercising.   If you are overweight you have rules that permit you to eat more than you need.   If you are unhappy you have rules that allow you to stay unhappy.

The rules you live by support the results you get each day.  If you don’t like the rules you are living by then it is time to change them.  Live by a new set of rules.

Robin Sharma shares some rules(in bold) that can improve your daily results.  Here they are:

#1. Generosity beats scarcity in every situation.

– Implement the rule by living by this statement.  “I am generous”

#2. If you’re the most successful person in every room, find a new room.

– Implement a new rule here, “I am growing”

#3. If you’re not up early, you’re sleeping too late.

-Change your rule to, “I get up early.”

#4. Epic performance has more to do with saying no than saying yes.

-Manage your time better by, “I carefully choose what I do.”

#5. Commit to becoming the undisputed heavyweight champion of your craft.

-Improve your performance by:  “I am an expert”

#6. Get fit so you can serve more people.

-Master your health with the rule, “I am healthy”

#7. Impact is a better measure of success than income.

-Create a rule to live more significantly, “I am making a significant contribution.”

#8. A failure only becomes a failure if you let it become a failure.

-Switch your thinking, “I am successful”

#9. Your job is to see the greatness in people who have yet to own the greatness within themselves.

-Help others to succeed, “I am help others be their best”,  take the “ego” out.

#10. Don’t wait to be inspired to start your dream. Start your dream to grow inspired.

– Set goals and work on them, “I work on my goals daily.”

#11. What the victim calls luck, the hero calls relentlessness.

-And, “I create my results.”

What rules do you live by?   What rules do you want to change?   What results do you want this year?